1/31/2014 1 Comment Running Away (Part 2)So this was it. I was nervous, but I didn’t care. I was finally getting what I wanted - a chance to meet him - a chance that only months before, I was just praying for. I’d seen him around campus a handful of times not counting the numerous times his face had been splashed across the front of the sports section of our university paper for leading our basketball team to victory. I was in love and convinced that this was the guy for me; or at least that we could date. . . .maybe? And when my opportunity appeared – I pounced. Turns out a close college girlfriend of mine knew him and would only be too happy to introduce the two of us. She did and we hit it off.
We talked on the phone. Everyday. And I liked what I heard and who he was – but unfortunately, others close to me did not like what they heard and thus I was “encouraged” to stop talking to him and because I did not have the courage to find out for myself whether or not he was the one for me – I did . So in June of 2005 the tables turned and the very guy that only a few monthly earlier I had run right into the arms of – I was now running away from. It would be more accurate, actually, to say that I disappeared. I avoided his phone calls, went the other way when I saw him on campus, ignored his texts, and he, the whole time, never knowing I was crying my heart out because I had no other place to be honest but in my tears and no one (not even myself) asked me what it was that I wanted. But maybe it was supposed to be that way. For this reason right here so I can sit here and tell you this story. So I could find out that I didn’t have the courage to be who I really was. Because being myself didn’t feel quite right to do. Most likely, because it was unfamiliar and because it was unfamiliar, I hung on to what I knew, what was safe, because I was afraid to make a mistake so I followed other people’s advice, or maybe that was being myself at that time. After all you have to crawl before you can walk right? I was definitely scooting. :-) Read Part 1 Here Read Part 3 Here
1 Comment
Nikki Hart
1/31/2014 09:07:07 am
I cant wait to finish reading....Thank you for sharing Chris:)
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