9/20/2016 0 Comments Life is a Circle (Part 2)Joining in the middle of the story? Click HERE to read Part 1 =================== The date was Sunday, December 18th. It was my graduation day; and quite frankly it started off pretty good; that was, until I saw him. If not mentioned before, Quinn was an athlete; and not just any athlete, but a star player on our school’s basketball team and for this reason the campus fieldhouse was also his second home and also a place where he sometimes worked part-time. Graduation was being held at the field house that day and also on that particular day he just happened to be working in the booth. From where they were having the graduates proceed into the gymnasium, I had to walk right past him. In those moments waiting to file into the auditorium, I sustained many emotions; embarrassment being among them in the way I had ended things between us and as a result, I avoided eye contact with him as much as possible until I could no longer and just the moment that our paths crossed, I stole a glance; he however, who seemed to be unaffected by our estrangement, winked at me as I walked past.
This seemingly small action flooded me with relief and I marched into the gymnasium a little more confidently that day. But it also awakened something within me that had lain dormant. I still liked him very much. As insignificant an action as winking was, the implication of it remained with me for the rest of the day. I didn’t know what to make of his seemingly small gesture; longing for him reappeared but I refused to remove myself from my stance and my actions stifled again, I softly cried while opening graduation cards in my room that night. So, you might ask, why put myself through torture? Why not, follow this whim and pursue something that I obviously so much wanted? The short answer? Afraid of making the wrong decision. Because, how could I tell that Quinn wasn’t the best that God had for me? I couldn’t; but not willing at that time to do anything about it I smothered my curiosity, brushed my disappointment aside and finished my career at The University of Michigan with a desire of the heart tamped down and locked away. My writing, therapeutic as it was, allowed me to move on and forgive myself and life and time brought other men and relationships; but I never forgot Quinn. **Anyway back to 2013** I was excited by our reunion at the airport no doubt and after Quinn and I said our goodbyes and I boarded the plane, I immediately called my sister to tell her who I had just run into. I hurried through as many details as I could before we were instructed to “switch off our mobile devices”, and then leaned back in my seat to reflect on what had just transpired. What were the chances that I would run into him again years later and that I would, possibly, have another chance to undo my “unjust” (at least in my eyes it was unjust) treatment towards him and give us a second run? But now that it was here, blatantly staring me in the face, I was now faced with the question of whether or not I even wanted it. Well, that was unexpected. All of this was. Because the facts of the matter were that years HAD passed, life had happened, brain chemistry and thoughts had changed, which is to say in a complicated manner – I was different. But I was also faced with the other question or whether this was actually even another chance? Hadn’t I seen something on Facebook about him having a baby and possibly even being married? There had been no time to confirm those facts within our brief exchange. But there was when I ran into him again at the airport that same year, same place, months later. What were the chances? Click Here to Continue the Story. . .
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